Thursday, April 15, 2010

If You Give a Cook a Cabinet

If you give a cook a cabinet, she’ll need to get countertops.
If she gets new countertops, she’ll have to pick out a new sink.
A new sink means a new faucet too!
The new faucet needs to coordinate with the new oven, microwave, and fridge.
The appliances sit in the new cabinets which are going to need knobs and pulls.
If she gets knobs and pulls for the kitchen, she’s going to pick out new ones for the new bathroom cabinet as well.
When she sees that the knobs and pulls match the bathroom faucet, she’s going to realize that the door handles throughout the entire house are a dated, 80’s polished brass and she’ll want updated burnished bronze lever handles.
The new door handles won’t match the (shudder) polished brass ceiling fan, so it will have to go.
The new ceiling fan will have to match the new light fixtures.
The new lights should probably include one for over the sink as well.
A well-lighted sink will look great with the under-cabinet lighting.
But wait! She can’t have under-cabinet lighting unless she gets a new cabinet.
And if you give a cook a cabinet….


southerninspiration said...

Ooooh, you know I like that!!! And I like, very much, those knobs and handles!!!


Tales From My Empty Nest said...

Loved your post. So cute!!! Love & blessings from NC!

Anonymous said...

Seriously! Great post.

Ben Wiles said...

THIS is why we don't have cable (HGTV, TLC, etc.). That, and ESPN, of course.

Nicely done.

Anonymous said...

Good choice, Love Mom

Teacherperson said...

Ode to Chocolate
by Barbara Crooker

I hate milk chocolate, don't want clouds
of cream diluting the dark night sky,
don't want pralines or raisins, rubble
in this smooth plateau. I like my coffee
black, my beer from Germany, wine
from Burgundy, the darker, the better.
I like my heroes complicated and brooding,
James Dean in oiled leather, leaning
on a motorcycle. You know the color.

Oh, chocolate! From the spice bazaars
of Africa, hulled in mills, beaten,
pressed in bars. The cold slab of a cave's
interior, when all the stars
have gone to sleep.

Chocolate strolls up to the microphone
and plays jazz at midnight, the low slow
notes of a bass clarinet. Chocolate saunters
down the runway, slouches in quaint
boutiques; its style is je ne sais quoi.
Chocolate stays up late and gambles,
likes roulette. Always bets
on the noir.

"Ode to Chocolate" by Barbara Crooker, from More.

Barbara said...

Love the way you think...we are on the same page...anxious to see if you have a new kitchen.